Desperate, I am.
Thursday, July 21, 2005
8:16 PM


Just finished watching another gratifying episode of that Korean period drama Jewel in the Palace. I'm totally hooked. The script is good, the acting is good, the setting is authentic, and above all, I think I'm infatuated with the lead actress. My heart aches everytime the director devotes three minutes solely showing her crying in anguish, my spirits soar every time she overcomes another mandatory adversity, and I just melt when she releases tears of joy amidst a quiet smile whilst watching the sunset. I'm such a sucker!

I'm STILL crazy over Angela Zhang Shao Han (for those of you who've endured my waxing lyrical over her). After all, she sang the chinese version of the theme song for the serial. And I'm still considering joining her fan club, but this irrational urge is starting to die off, partly because of the new idol in my heart.

...

Reflecting on my recent sudden outburst of idolizing female stars, I realise that I've been doing roughly the same thing with all the girls I've ever secretly (some, not so secretly)(okay, MOST not so secretly), idolizing them, placing them upon the pedastal of worship.

...

I remembered having read these lines from the book of Job Chapter 31 in one of C.S. Lewis' theological works (I think it was Mere Christianity).

26 if I have regarded the sun in its radiance
or the moon moving in splendor,
27 so that my heart was secretly enticed
and my hand offered them a kiss of homage,
28 then these also would be sins to be judged,
for I would have been unfaithful to God on high.

Job recognized that it was in his innate nature to desire to idolize and worship objects and symbols. So, it appears that I'm no different from him. However, as any good Christian would tell you, the only One worthy and worth it of filling in this void in my soul would be God. And only then, would I be a complete and stable person, for my foundation is the unchanging and everlasting Rock.

Yeah, so I've gotta start going crazy over Jesus or something and act like overzealous Evangelists huh? And then maybe Zhang Shao Han will read my blog and see how 'complete' and 'mature' I am and starting emailing me. Alas, but by that time it would be too late, for I would no longer be irrationally infatuated with her no more.

Either ways, my idolizing would be pointless, except perhaps to satisfy my trivial whims.

Sigh.

I need to get out of the army.

Comments:
At long last... Gotta type www before yr addy... What's up with Zhang Shao Han? Even my sister who likes that show is asking... Haha!
 
oo..that theme song is sang by her one ar? its not bad lar.. but dun really fancy the show.. everyday day cook cook...
 
To err is human. Besides, why does God bequeath a place but noone else? In this way I'm exactly opposite in thinking. Unlike you, however, I write letters to a porn star and always receive a response. Though, I write to dissuade her from carrying on working in an industry where her beauty is so horribly exploited.
 
I hope you never mention what was stated above again. It was a mistake to let it out so casually.
 
Post a Comment
( 4 comment)


July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
December 2006
March 2007